Okay, ok, O.K.! I have got to calm down, I keep telling myself. What good is worrying? I just have to do the best I possibly can. Which is saying a lot.

Between selling furniture, cancelling services, packing, packing suitcases, packing boxes, stacking boxes, disassembling stuff, throwing out stuff, cleaning up, and trying to have a life, I can almost feel my hair turning grey, one strand at a time. I know I’m not the first person in the history of the world to have to move from one country to another, but it is the first time for me. Well, kinda. My parents did it some years ago and, at that time, in a way, I did it too, but not really. Because I only had my clothes and shoes and books to bring with me then. Now I have “household goods” in addition to “personal effects”. I have had these during previous moves, between cities, too, but I had someone to help me then: a boyfriend. No such help now, because I have never been more single. And because I’m not asking anyone for help. Why? I’m not sure…I guess I just don’t want to take any favours I can’t return, you know? Also, those moves with “household goods” were within Canada. A complllletely different ball game.

I picked up those terms in quotes above from the customs forms I’m going to have to fill for this move. Yea, as if the stress of packing and other activities I mentioned up there wasn’t enough, I have to fill out forms for my “unaccompanied goods” to cross the border from Canada to the US. I also have to make detailed packing lists for this purpose. Detailed. Packing. Lists. Sort of like an inventory of what I have. I think that is incredibly tedious. I’m afraid I will drop dead from boredom in the middle of making said lists.

I’m still looking into hiring movers but, my goodness, it apparently costs as much to move from Toronto to Manhattan as it does to move from Toronto to San Francisco! Can you believe that?! I mean, the difference is nearly 3500 km!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “Manhattan is the most difficult city to move into,” the moving companies tell me. So what’s my other option? Renting a truck and having someone drive it down. And that means I do all the paperwork, documentation, what-have-you myself.

Assuming I survive that, all I want from life at this moment is for this move from Toronto to New York to go off without a hitch. I’m absolutely sure I can deal with pretty much everything else life throws at me. But this move…