How to Make a Clean Break

Perform a cleanse. If you feel your resolve weakening, don’t think too much about it.  Act swiftly and click, or tap, or ignite.

  • Look through your phonebook and delete the numbers of people you don’t want to talk to. Delete them so that you don’t get back in touch with them. With the memory that you have, I can only hope that you will somehow forget their number too, so that when they call you or message you again, you’ll be able to honestly say, “Who is this?”
  • Look through your phonebook and delete the numbers of people you shouldn’t talk to. If you stumble upon their name when scrolling through your contacts at some later point in time, you may be reminded of them and may be tempted to get back in touch. Don’t let that temptation reside in something as simple and innocuous as a contact list. Delete them already.
  • Look through your Facebook friends list and delete the people whom you haven’t deleted yet because following their lives turns a knife in your side and the pain is delicious and addictive. You want to see whom he’s dating now, or if she’s been back to that place you used to frequent together. Why should any of it make a difference to you? It isn’t worth it. Rid yourself of the drama. Delete them all. Just do it. You’ll thank yourself later.
    • If you can be friends with them after a while, you can add them back on Facebook. Not that you have to. It’s not like all real friends must be your friends on Facebook…
    • …and vice versa. So while you’re at it, look through your Facebook friends list again and delete the people who aren’t really friends and, instead, are just annoying with their incessant, irrelevant, ridiculous updates. Why are they even on your friends list? Maybe you barely know them, have hardly ever talked, if at all, and have accepted their “Friend Request” so they wouldn’t feel rejected. Those people have seven-hundred-and-something people on their list. Delete them. They won’t even notice it.
    • Also, delete the people who are just acquaintances, whom you haven’t met more than once and whom you really don’t care to see or hear from again. They’re just inflating the numbers on your list. No one cares about how many Facebook friends you have. If you know people who do, delete them too.
  • Go through your text messages, if you have one of those smartphones that let you store tens of thousands of texts.
    Delete the ones which only remind you of bad times.
    Delete the ones which upset you.
    Delete the ones which are meaningless now, no matter how much they meant when they were composed.
    Just do it. Take a deep breath and tell your phone that yes, you’re sure you want to delete those messages or that conversation.
  • Emails. Few people write them anymore, but maybe someone wrote you one a long time ago. Maybe there are evocative ones hidden within all those marketing slogans which ram your inbox every day. Go through your emails. Find the ones written from the heart. They don’t mean anything anymore. Delete them.
  • Gather all the cards, Hallmark and other varieties, which lay around your house.
    Add to these any notes written by people who’ve written themselves out of your life.
    Sift through them.
    There are some from people you don’ t speak to anymore.
    There are some from people you won’t speak to anymore.
    There are some which contain sentiments which aren’t true anymore.
    Throw them away. Better yet, have a little bonfire. Add to it pressed flowers and leaves, as kindling. Invite some understanding friends over, add some wine and marshmallows, make a real thing out of it. All this, without leaving the comfort of your home. If you’re a girl, keep all shoes safe distance from any flame, supervised or not.
  • If you’ve ever written anything related to people who aren’t a part of your life now, in private journals and the like, don’t get rid of it.
    When you read them again, you will see exactly how weak you were and how much you have grown.
    Or you will see exactly how strong you were and take strength from your own words, again.
    Keep those words, those pages, those books, those journals. That’s where you’ll see your journey and the parts you should have remembered but had forgotten.

If you don’t agree with any or all of these and want to hold on to things which don’t really matter anymore, by all means, do it. It can be self-destructive. Consider yourself warned.