The other day I was talking to a friend about a guy who’d said he did not want a serious relationship. My friend told me something that I hadn’t really been able to admit, I suppose. She said that if he met the right girl he wouldn’t even think about the fact that he didn’t want to get into something serious. He wouldn’t think, Oh, yes, I think she’s perfect for me, but, hey, I don’t want to commit to anyone so I think I’ll let this one pass too. That lingered in my head until…later that same day, I went shopping. It was supposed to be strictly window shopping—touching and no buying, but when I found some excellent deals that I just couldn’t pass up, I had to fish out the credit cards (which, being in a financial crunch, I had sworn off some time ago). I couldn’t help but see glaring parallels.
Whether you’re window shopping for romance or shoes, finding the perfect person is like setting eyes upon a gorgeous pair of sandals which turn out to be on sale. All your rules go out the window. You don’t think about what you’d decided was best for you. Yes, maybe you’re in debt, but, hey, if those adorable shoes are 60% off, aren’t they even more perfect? How can you possibly not get them? Face it, you say to yourself, you are going to buy another pair of shoes at some point. Why not these? In fact, you’re actually saving money by not buying them at full price, right? Right. When you find the right person there probably isn’t an internal persuasive monologue of that sort. It’s unnecessary because subconsciously your rulebook suddenly has nothing but blank pages where there once were relationship rules. You aren’t thinking about how you’d sworn off men. You aren’t thinking about how your freedom is so important to you, or how you’d predicted you’d never fall for anyone again. All you want is that warm, fuzzy feeling that makes you feel so good, the high that comes with it, that adrenaline rush. But is the investment worth the potential loss?