It hasn’t sunk in yet.
If you’ve kept up with my recent writing (and you have, haven’t you?) then you know that the second leg of the move involves being in New Jersey, at my parents’ home, for a week, before my lease begins. That’s where I am right now. I got in last night and have been at work all day, spent time with my parents in the evening, hung out with my brother…And I think this is why it hasn’t sunk in yet. I do this all the time. I visit my parents and brother here quite often. And, yes, often with 5 bags in tow. So this isn’t new. Nothing about this is actually any different from any other time that I’ve visited. Except that this time I don’t have a set of keys tucked into an inside pocket of a bag, to be taken out during the cab ride home from Pearson airport, and that there is no home to go back to.
Maybe it’ll hit me when I actually move into my apartment. When I have all those moving boxes I packed in 10 days around me and when I set up the new furniture and when I unpack. It’ll become real when I wake up in the morning to a room I’m still not used to and I take Dolce down 14 floors and see a new sight outside the building’s doors. Even the thought of this seems foreign. I cannot actually imagine living anywhere else but in Toronto.
I keep reminding myself that I’m not going back there anymore. Every time I do this, I feel a little sad, but in a the-thought-of-this-makes-me-sad kinda way. Do you know what I mean? This move just hasn’t become completely real yet.
But soon, very soon, I will be tête-à-tête (I’m so going to miss the bilingualism of Canada!) with the reality of a new city to make my home, of learning the ins and outs of it, of learning the little rules and idiosyncrasies that are peculiar to this city, of learning which restaurants (and brunch spots) are worth every penny and which are simply overrated, of learning the city’s lingo (each city has its own, you know), of dealing with money that’s only green and not all the colours of the rainbow (and no loonies and toonies), of making new friends, of feeling like an outsider, of starting a life from scratch…except for all the shoes that have seen me through thick and thin.
But, hey, you know what? Starting from scratch means that this is a fresh start. I get to leave all the baggage behind. I get a chance to not repeat some mistakes. I get to leave behind the places that had memories associated with them. I get to leave behind all the people who didn’t make my world a better place. The people who matter will remain in my life irrespective of what my address is.
My stay in Toronto helped me discover myself. I learned much about who I am, what makes me tick, what I stand for. Perhaps New York will help me discover completely different facets of myself. Maybe it’ll even help toughen me up. Besides, it’s New York; enough said?
I’m feeling some combination of sadness and excitement and anxiety. Six more days to go. Deep breaths are key.
I read somewhere recently that moving is the third most stressful event in a person’s life, after death and divorce.
I feel like I can finally allow myself to calm down and take a nice deep breath. Except I’m finding it tough to be calm and I think it might be because what I was given this morning probably wasn’t decaf. I think the barista gave me caf. And I’ve been off caf. for at least 3 months now! So my heart is racing, I have had an almost-headache since the “decaf” latte (it feels like I’m just about to get a headache, but it’s not quite there yet, do you know what I mean?), and I’ve felt like singing and dancing all day long. Or is this simply a result of some major move-related closures that occurred today? Whatever it is, I’ve been bouncing off the walls.
I’m able to talk about this because it’s nearly resolved now. As of this moment, I have a moving company all set to pick up my stuff on the 23rd. And I leave the next day. Getting to this point was tough on me.
- As I mentioned in a previous post, there was hardly a difference in the quotes I received for moving to SF and for moving to NYC! I’m not even taking any furniture with me and yet the quotes remained sky high. Incredibly frustrating.
- This was made worse by the fact that I was done with 65% of my packing within a week. It’s only 18th Jan today, my lease in NY doesn’t start til Feb 1, and I have my current apartment through March. W.T.F. was wrong with me that I couldn’t slow down?!
- Add to that my furniture getting sold. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to get rid of everything—my bed, couch, dresser, dining table, coffee tables, etc. so I put up this flyer for a “moving out sale” in my building. Within 4 days it was all gone. So now I basically have an empty apartment to live in as long as I’m here in T.
- So with the packing all done, furniture all sold, I was getting super, super restless! I needed to get a move on and I needed it to be ASAP. I knew I could finish packing the rest of my stuff in 2 days.
- So, my parents, sensing my stress (because I blogged about it perhaps? I know I wasn’t talking much..), offered to have me live with them til Feb 1, if need be. What about the moving truck, if I ever find one? I asked. My dad suggested that I have everything delivered to our warehouse in NJ where it could be stored until moving day. That changed a lot of the variables.
- Now that the moving truck was going to a warehouse, not a residential area, I didn’t have to be charged extra fees because “Manhattan is the most difficult city to move into.” (Imagine the bit in quotes being said in a deep, mocking voice.) So now I was shopping around for a whole new set of moving quotes…
- …which didn’t yield too much of a difference until an Operations Assistant at one of the many (6) moving companies I was talking to wrote, “we could offer you another option which would be significantly lower. The items which you listed, can they be secured onto a skid?” Could they?! 80% of the stuff is boxes! What better way to transport them efficiently than on a skid?! I said something to that effect and waited eagerly for her reply. I dreamed of what “significantly lower” might mean.
- Folks, the new quote this Universe-send eventually gave me was about one-third the other quotes. It would go on one of their freight trucks, she explained to me, and could I be flexible with the delivery date? Um…yeah! Since I was going to go to NJ as soon as the stuff was picked up and the stuff itself was going to our warehouse, all I needed was for delivery to be before Feb 1. She looked into it, said that worked for them, and we were in business. Perfection, what? (I did get an extra $20000 of insurance on my stuff though.) Signed the quote and the forms and returned them today. Deal sealed.
- I’ll name names: The moving company is Ranger Moving Systems, a Mayflower Canada agent. So far so helpful, reasonable, and easy to work with. The other companies stuck to their minimum weight of 2100 lbs and wouldn’t budge.
- The last leg of this move, from NJ to NY(/The City), will be taken care of by a shipping company we work quite closely with which, it turns out, does help with moves in Manhattan (but not from Canada, ya know). In fact, we’re having everything delivered from Toronto to their warehouse now, which is also in NJ so it can go directly from there to New York.
As for my travel plans, the San Francisco trip I’d cancelled left me with a travel voucher from American Airlines to be used within a year which, I know, is a long time, but I did need to take a flight now, so I used it for a one-way Business Class ticket on the 24th of January with my little Dolce. I get to check in three bags at no charge and have a comfy seat (yea, yea, among other things), which will make a difference that evening. Because a hugely stressful time, if all goes right, will be about 70% behind me. Oh how tightly my fingers are crossed! Please cross yours too for me, won’t you?